Overdue update

Hmmm so much for that 'writing here more' project.

Short version of the last few months:

Jack and I have broken up. We are still best friends, but it was past time.

Airen and I have also broken up. We're also still friends, although we're taking the time to let a little distance heal things.

Boywonder and I are still together. Our dynamic is evolving, but mostly we're vanilla partners who switch a lot in play. (Although come to think of it, I owe him a good beating for his birthday earlier this week...)

Yeah. And now to my next post for the rant I came here to write about subspace and consent.

Date Night with Jack

We have just watched, "Hitman," for the first time, and my blood is simmering with the desire to do naughty things to the dangerous ingénue of the movie.

Jack, however, is here, and warm, and my fingers begin to flex in anticipation of wrapping them around his body.

Soon, we are kissing and my body is wrapped around his until I have pressed him onto his back and my body holds his down. His breathing is quick, my beautiful partner is not normally very submissive, but he enjoys it when I sometimes take charge.

It isn't long before I have stripped his shirt from his skin, exposing the smooth expanse of his chest, and dragged his jeans to his ankles, leaving them there as an impromptu hobble. I love seeing him like this, vulnerable and aroused and so incredibly desirable.

I take my time in teasing him: nibbles to his ears, his neck. Sharp nips to his nipples, his lips, while he gasps, moans, twists beneath me.

My shirt is gone, my bra shortly after, and I drag my breasts over his lightly heaving chest, down the flat planes of his stomach and over the swelling arousal at his groin.

His hips shift upward, a silent plea, but I continue to take my time, lingering with lips and tongue at the juncture of hip and groin while he groans and whimpers a little, rubbing my cheek cat-like against his warm cock.

This is my partner, my lover, and the only person for whom I do this, the only person whose cock I will slowly envelope with my mouth, slowly wrap my lips around and stroke with long, slow laps of my tongue. He is the only one for whom I will press myself to my limit, taking him into my mouth and my throat until my lips touch his groin and my lightly spasming throat strokes the head of his cock.

With others, I will play, I will tease, I will tempt you with what you can't have, but only to Jack will I give all of myself, and I do tonight.

Tonight, I stroke him with lips, teeth, and tongue, pressing his hands into the bed and forcing him still while I suck him, stroke him, tease him to the brink and then back off.

Shortly he is writhing beneath me while I hold him down with my will at least as much as my hands, eventually settling into an slow rhythm that drags him ever so slowly toward the brink until he is shuddering like a fly-stung horse as I slowly, inexorably, drag him over the brink until he spasms inside of me, filling me, and my hands gentle around his wrists while I swallow him inside of me.

First day

Today is my first day back in class in much too long a time. I am taking 18 credit hours this semester, and I'm thrilled with it.

But for now, on the first day, I'm bored to tears by the usual introductory speeches. I'm supposed to be engaging my brain, thinking about how to look at the world sociologically, and pull myself back to see the big picture.

What I'm thinking about, instead, is Jack. I'm thinking about the taste of his skin on our bedsheets. I'm thinking about the curve of his ass when he sleeps on his stomach, about the feel of it beneath my hand when I run my palm over his body. I'm thinking about the scent of his mouth on mine, and the way that his fingers clench on my skin when we kiss. I'm thinking about the press of his body against mine and the taste of his sweat as he moves inside of me.

I'm thinking about the feeling of his skin beneath my nails as my body spasms around him, about the curve of his body against mine when I spoon him- the warmth of him against my abdomen and groin. I'm thinking about the taste of his lips, like sweet and spicy tea, and the way that they give beneath my teeth.

I'm thinking about the man who will be my lover, when all others are gone.

My lover's lover

I walk into the house, and it's oddly quiet. There are two other people here, but I can't see them, can't hear them. 

Slowly, I wander the rooms of my home... my sneakered feet are quiet on the hardwood as I wonder what I will find when I find them.

The guest bedroom is empty, the same with the main bedroom, the media room... until I wander into the kitchen.

He is pressing her into the refrigerator, his pants down and pressed against her while she writhes and moans. Her hands are locked above her head in one of his fists while the other delves into her moist cunt and he is making low, pleased sounds at her response.

The line of his body, pressed against her, is beautiful and I go to them, pressing my suddenly painfully overdressedboday into his. I can taste the slick salt of his sweat and arousal as I press my mouth into the curve of his back. 

My lover is beautiful right now, as he plays with this girl we've both come to care for.  

Interlude

He is lying back on our couch, while she lies between his legs, her head resting on his chest. 

Every so often, he reaches for her hair, drawing her head back and kissing her deeply. She whimpers, writhing against him as her body begs for what it hopes is coming next. 

And he smiles, and drags slow hands over her skin. 

Good day

So I haven't had much to say lately.

The past couple of weeks have been hard, and I've been taking them harder even than they deserve. 

Yesterday starting me feeling better, though, so I'm going to write about it despite it's (mostly) lack of kinkiness. 

Jack and I started the day with lunch with the Cunning Linguist, who's in town for a kink event. That was wonderful, as always- no really, I hate being cuddled between two extremely attractive men. Seriously. Oh noes!

Afterwards, since we were too early to go to Archer's place, we killed some time at the bookstore, where I found exactly the book I've been looking for- yay!- and spent a happy half-hour taking copious notes in the margins. 

 

Eventually, Jack and I went out to Archer's house, and spent several hours putting arrows (mostly) into a target, for the first time in 10 years. Jack has a real talent for it, but I struggled a bit, especially since I was learning a new way to nock and fire that will be more compatible with mounted archery.

Yes, you read that right. 

Mounted archery. Like this:

 

Yes there will be pictures eventually, but meanwhile I have to get halfway decent on the ground again, first :)

Afterwards, Terry and Lucivar joined us and we shot various firearms- Jack is enamored of the AK-47, probably at least partly due to his Russian studies. 

I stuck to handguns, as they're my preference anyway. Next time I might play with the bigger toys, but it's been long enough (and my shoulders were sore enough!) that I decided to stick to what I know. 

From there, we got some rather good Thai food, and then headed home, where I studied more before bed. 

Every once in a while, the Universe reminds me how worth it even the unpleasant periods of my life are. 

Homecoming

I just had sex again.

Like, real vaginal intercourse. 

Shut up, I know that's a heterosexist view, but when you're in a het relationship and can't have penis + vagina sex, well, it suddenly seems like the Only Kind That Counts. You know, that Thing-You-Can't-Have thing.

Now, PC-stuff aside....

I HAD SEX AGAIN!

You cannot possibly know how happy that makes me, how relieved. I've had vaginismus for years. Short version: that means sex hurts. Bad. My cunt doesn't dilate, and open up in prep for penetration. 

I've been working on it slowly, for months. Fingers, a slim dildo. Lots of prep, lots of lube, lots of fantasizing and alwaysalwaysalways stopping if it started to hurt. 

It's been a lot of fucking work, quite frankly, and there's been more than once when I wondered if I'd ever manage to have sex again, if it was even worth it. 

There have been so many times when I couldn't manage even a finger (and I have small hands) when I just bit back tears and knew I'd never have sex with my partner again. 

I've been terrified in the back of my head for over a year now that we would never fix this, and that one day he'd just get tired of it, tired of me and my myriad health and head issues, and just find someone else less fucked up, less hurting, less broken. 

But today, I've been fantasizing since sucking him off last night of him returning the favor, fantasized about the way his lips feel against mine... and I don't mean the ones on my face. I've been fantasizing about the scrape of his stubble against my inner thighs, and his fingers parting my cunt. 

But I've been bleeding for a week, and rather profusely at that.

Until today.

So today, I dragged him down to me, met his lips with mine and kissed him for a long time. I love the way that when I kiss him, the world disappears. Love the scent of him rubbed into my skin. I don't believe in anything like soul mates anymore, I don't think. But I do believe that he is my complement, the one I want to spend my life with. 

Yes, I love other people. I've never known how not to, never known how to only love one person. But he is the one I want to grow old next to, the one I want to spoil grandkids with.

So I kissed him, and all of this passed through my mind in that eyeblink that you get sometimes when the entire world comes together perfectly. 

I kissed him, and I don't even remember how we ended up with his fingers in my cunt, his face between my legs. I remember moments, beautiful moments, but I couldn't give you a timeline, a narrative. Just that we were kissing, and then his mouth was on my through my panties and then my panties were gone and his lips were on my cunt and his tongue was on my clit and I was moaning and writhing and GODS it felt so good. 

He loves going down on me, he really does. I never used to be that into it, but Jack has made me a convert. I'll never like it as much as I like reciprocating, but, well... that would be hard.

(No pun intended)

I don't remember how we got there, but his fingers were in me, one and then I was asking for two shortly before I came, and I was riding his fingers, my hips bucking against his face, against his mouth, and I could see him framed between my thighs, watching my face and I was moaning and I could feel the orgasm building, building and just out of reach. I remember riding his fingers, bucking and pressing,  shoving his fingers against that spot inside of me and then suddenly it was almost there and I was grinding my clit against his face and then cumming, god I was cumming and shaking and arching and in my head I was screaming but I think I was only making those whimpering noises I made when I cum. 

Jack is telling me that I gasp when I cum, that I go rigid and shake, that my mouth falls open and my eyes go wide. He says I shake, forward and back against him. 

I don't know. All I know is the memory of the orgasm running through me until I didn't know if I could take anymore, and then his tongue would flick gently one more time across my clit, making me jump and gasp again. 

I remember going limp, my hands falling to my thighs from his hair as he went to clean up a little, and it occurred to me that maybe.... maybe... that I wanted to try. 

And we did. 

It hurt. I won't pretend otherwise. I don't know if I'll ever have sex without it hurting again, but Goddess of Night and Lovers it was so wonderfully worth it. 

The feeling of him filling me, slowly rocking into me and pressing until he was all the way inside of me, the homecoming of it. 

I've missed his cock inside me, missed him filling me up inside, missed the closeness and the intimacy of it. 

As he rocked in and out of me, I kept waiting for it to hurt more, waited for the pain to become too much, like it so often has before. 

Only it didn't.

And then my legs were around his waist and his cock found that spot in me and I was moaning and whimpering, "Harder..." and he complied and I felt it building again, that spot that feels so goddamned good and then he was cumming and it felt like the best thing to ever happen to me. 

I don't remember coming down, just my arms wrapped around him and then I was shaking- laughing and crying and whispering, "I missed you so much," and, "I didn't know if I'd ever be able to do that again."

I'm still grinning like an idiot. 

And yes, I'm sore. 

But I don't give a rat's ass. 

I'm just thrilled to be back among the sexually active!

Burned

My home fries burned. 

I'd say I feel bad about this, but I'd be lying.

Right through my teeth.

Because you know why they burned?

They burned because I was on the kitchen floor, sucking Jack's cock while he beat me over the shoulders and back with his belt. 

Yeah.

Who needs food after that?

Night Moves

I woke up this morning, still wet from Jack's face between my thighs. 

No, I still wasn't feeling 100%, but he's so damned cute when he's being a horndog.

I swear, in any other male this constant desire- and insistence on expressing it- would be annoying as hell.

In him, though, it makes me blush and giggle like a virgin. 

And give in. 

Oh, it took some giggling and squirming and figuring out, but it wasn't long before we were kissing (albeit carefully, since I was still congested) and making out (albeit gently since I was still a little sick) and laughing. 

He pulled away from me, showing me his beautiful, erect cock. 

This is what you do to me, just kissing and playing with you, he told me. 

I melted inside. I love knowing that I do that to him. Love it. 

I beckoned to him impatiently, throat still too sore to talk much- and therefore too sore to do what I so wanted to- but not too sore to play with my very favoritest toy. 

He straddled my chest, thighs across my breasts, hands tight on the headboard while I played with him. 

Licking up and down his shaft, sucking the head of him tightly into my mouth... not far, not far at all... but far enough. Swallowing the purple head of him inside my soft, pink mouth, and looking at him all the while. I knew the expression on my face, the evil joy of it. Lilith must have looked at Adam like that, because Eve never would have. 

I love teasing him. Scraping my teeth gently over that sensitive little helmeted head, lathing the underside of it with my tongue, the twin sensations enough to make him groan and grip the bed hard enough to make the antique wood creak. 

Eventually, though, in that position my jaw got sore and throat was still too sore to finish properly.

So we traded places... sort of. He slid down my body, the rough-smooth touch of his skin making my squirm and moan this time, and his breath blowing hot on my thighs. 

Shaving

I shaved Jack today. 

Running my razor over the beautiful, delicate skin of his cock and balls. Watching the droplets pour down over his skin.

He's beautiful, in the running water. He doesn't believe it, but it's true. 

It started as a joke.

So much with us does. 

He was shaving his balls, something he started about a year ago, when I complained about getting hairs in my teeth. I watched (we always shower together) with my usual fascination. The soft scrape of the razor over that most sensitive of skin... most men will tell you that the skin of their balls is almost more sensitive than that of their cocks. Certainly more so than the shaft.

I've never dated another man willing to let me near his balls with something that sharp. 

But Jack will. 

He knows I prize those beautiful, dangling little toys far too much to ever harm them.

I teased him that the rest of his pubic hair was getting long enough to braid, and he started to do his usual careless trimming of it, running the razor lightly down the skin. 

I laughed, pointing out that that didn't work very well, leaving some hairs very long, and other patches nearly bare. It's, um, not his best look. 

You can always do it like I do, I pointed out, mischevious smile firmly in place. 

He raised an eyebrow at my nearly-grown-back-in mound. 

Here, I'll show you, I told him. I took the razor and dragged it down, over the fleshy mound that protects his cock and balls, stopping every swipe or so to rinse the razor. 

And slowly, so slowly, his beautiful skin was revealed. Slowly, with every swipe, I could see a little more of him. 

I knelt down, the razor in my hand, to better see what I was doing, water running down both of our skin.

I opened his thighs wide, exposing that vulnerable crease between thighs and groin, swiping the deadly sharp blade over it. Bare inches from his femoral artery.

Scraped it gently over his beautiful, beautiful cock, half-hard from my hands simply moving him around. 

Ran it over his balls, removing every last hair I could find. 

Kissed his cock gently, then accept his hand up, back to my feet. 

Then I used his thigh as a footstool to shave my own legs. 

My life rocks sometimes. 

Shower sex, my style

I was in the bathroom, fresh from the shower. We've been moving for the last two days, so I hadn't had one in two days- yum!
So this, my first shower in my new home, was one to savor. I spent a good 45 minutes under the steaming water- washing and conditioning my hair, shaving from head to toe, lightly exfoliating... that whole girly shebang I so seldom give myself permission for.
When I finally got out, I perched on the edge of the tub and painted my toenails. They're now a soft, abalone-shell white.
It was during this that Jack walked in.
"Yum," he said, eyeing my again-naked pussy. I grinned.
"Yep," I responded, showing him that my 6 months of bleeding seems to be slowly dripping to a halt, and that I was therefore clean again.
He grinned back, sliding his hands up my calves.
I stiffened for a half-second, not totally expecting his immediate response, but then relaxed. If I still tasted off, he'd just stop, no reason to fret over it.

A moment later, for the first time in months, I felt his lips touch my pussy.
The sensation was electric (I always thought that was a silly phrase until last night!) and I gasped.
His tongue teased its way between my pussy lips and I whimpered softly.
He stayed that way, teasing me lightly, never quite making it to my clitoris, just teasing and licking and kissing my pussy lips as though they were the lips of my mouth.

All I could do was clench my fingers spasmodically around the little bottle of nail polish, forgotten in my fist.

I spent the rest of the night wet with anticipation.

Bookstore Bottoming

We were sitting on the floor at the bookstore, in the late autumn sunshine, my head in his lap.
I was reading another Anita Blake book (I'm not really that obsessed with them, I just decided to reread the series because it's been a while), and generally just enjoying his company. He petted my hair as I read, and I made small, happy noises.

He leaned down, kissing me gently, and I parted my lips for him.
I've been feeling pretty submissive lately, so this was nice.
He gripped my jaw gently while I opened my mouth for him, and he explored me gently with his tongue, soft and wet against my lips.
I made small, happy sounds for him, writhing a little.
He tightened his grip and my noises got happier.

He smiled. I love that evil look in his eyes. Usually, I see that evil look when we're sharing toys over the helpless body of some hapless masochist, but today, seeing it in his eyes just for me, I shivered.
I know exactly how twisted his mind is.

He caressed me gently, until I writhed a little and couldn't stand it anymore.
"Hurt me, please?" I whispered, before I could lose my nerve.
Almost instantly, his hand tightened around my throat and I closed my eyes, back arching in pleasure.
He released my throat slowly, almost reluctantly and petted me a little while I made more small happy sounds. Then he wrapped his fingers in my hair and dragged my head around a little, sending me instantly under even further.
Goddess, I love that sensation.
He pulled my face up to his and kissed me- gently, the barest brush of lips while his- then dug his nails into my throat.
His teeth into my ear.
I was whimpering softly, trying not to draw attention to myself in the bookstore, but too aroused to care very much.
He took my finger into his mouth, biting down until I gasped.

And then he wrapped me in his arms, and told me that he loves me.

Conversation

"I'm still scared of being 'too'."

"Too what?"

"Too anything. Too needy, too scared, too loud, to fucked up. I'm still scared I'll be too, and you'll get tired of it and leave."

*long silence*

"That's your cue to say something comforting, you know."

"I know, I'm trying to think of how to say it."

*long, scared pause*

"We've been together almost three years, and we've been through some... really... rough times. And that tells me that we have what it takes to spend the rest of our lives together. Which is good, because I want to."

*random hysterical bawling/laughing*
(which by the way.... bad idea while the person you're clinging to while you do it is driving)

Sucking Jack's cock

It was time to go to a friend's house and watch the election results. Jack had been napping all afternoon, so I went to wake him up.
The bedroom was dark and cool, with our rainstorm cd surging softly in the background. I flipped on the light just as he threw the covers back and he was exposed to me.
Jack sleeps naked.
He was sprawled on his back, nude. His skin bright against our sage green sheets, legs spread wide, one arm thrown over his eyes and his cock half-hard and dark against the curling nest of his trimmed cockhair.
He is so beautiful.

I couldn't resist, and after almost three years, I didn't bother trying.
I crawled onto the bed, full dressed to his nudity, and took him into my mouth.
It was almost abrupt, there was no foreplay, no kissing, no playing. Just the taste of his cock between my lips. Jack gasped, I think he just expected me to rub against it like I usually do, but I took his cock all the way into my warm, wet mouth.
He made a small noise, and I stroked my tongue across the head of him. I drew back and ran my teeth along the length of his cock, then pressed forward, swallowing him, until my lips kissed his cockhair. He moaned, and I drew back, swirling my tongue around the head of him and looking up to let him see the raw hunger in my eyes. I wanted this. Wanted the taste of him, the feel of him.

I didn't walk into this relationship a virgin. Not by a long shot. And I love cocks. I love the shapes of them, the flavors of them, the textures of them. When combined with my oral fixation... well, I love oral sex. I love sucking cock, and I love sucking Jack's cock more than any other.

I settled into that rhythm that he loves, fast and deep, the same rhythm he loves to use when he's fucking me. My fingers dug into his thighs and he made little sounds in his throat with every stroke of my mouth. Finally, when he was ready to cum, he took my hair in his hands, gripping tightly and fucking my mouth. Yes, I know it's more submissive than I usually like to go, but I love this moment. I love the grip of his hands in my hair (short though it is now!) and the thrust of his hips beneath me. I love the soft, desperate sounds he makes and the way his hips pump into my mouth until I feel him twitch and cum in me and I'm swallowing and making small sounds of pleasure myself.

We only slowly come down... my mouth still moving slowly over him, gently now where he's so post-orgasmically sensitive, my hands tender against his thighs.

Finally, I drew away, kissed his cock lightly, playfully now, and told him to get dressed, it was time to go...

Random vignettes from the weekend- suspended by Utah Rox

Utah Rox taught the Objectification class I took. By the end of the class, we had a human light switch (my adorable Kat), table, computer stand, couch, and ottoman.

I'm little. Like, 107lbs little.
I got to sit on the couch, and put my feet up on the ottoman. I developed a pretty quick crush on the instructor, but didn't worry too much about it because I knew I had my hands rather full of boys already.
Until the next day, during Andrew's bloodplay class. Sangre made, um, a bit of a mess. As in, she was completely covered in her own blood, rubbing it into her skin and dipping her fingers in it. She's a sick little bitch, and I like her a lot :)
Suffice to say, however, that this posed some problems getting her back up to her room because she was technically a biohazard.
So we literally carried her through the hotel lobby wrapped in plastic sheeting to opaqueness (poor nillas in that lobby!!!) and stuffed her in the elevator along with everyone else carrying anything else that was a biohazard.It was a rather amusing adventure, and while Sangre showered, Andrew, Jack, Rox, and I chatted.
I don't remember the conversation. It ended up being discussed that Jack and I might be bleeding that night. Since I hadn't yet gotten my bawling in, I was pleased with this plan.

Yes, I'm a slut. It's fun. Deal with it.

That night, however, when I ran into Rox, he said that he was looking for someone to suspend. I'm not terribly into suspension, so when he commented that I was the perfect size for it (subtle, Rox. You'd already asked my weight, remember? :-p), I said I had only done it once and it was a little painful for me. He agreed that Shibari suspension could be that way, but that wasn't what he intended.

See Bella's curiousity aroused. I inquired. He answered.

I started grinning. We negotiated with Jack and he stayed nearby to watch and keep a eye on me.

So Rox started setting up, and I stripped and stood on a chair. It's such a good thing I have no issues with nudity, because it's amazing how many people stop *in a BDSM club with play going on* to stare at one naked chick. Can someone explain this to me? Sure, I'm cute, but I was hardly the only attractive female there who could be stared at.Whatever, it's just amusing in retrospect.

Then he wrapped me in green pastic wrap of some kind, until it must have looked like I was wearing a plastic tube-dress.

And then he removed the chair.

I had a spurt of panic when the chest took the weight of my body and I was actually hanging by *plastic wrap*. The little part of my brain that thinks everything I do is stupid was gibbering wildly, screaming, "It's fucking plastic wrap! You're going to fall and break your neck and OHMYFUCKINGGOD!"

The rest of me was just grinning stupidly and absolutely thrilled with the entire Universe.
By the time he had my feet up as well, I was just drifting in pleasure and that beautiful mental escape that bottoming brings me.I was pretty helpless up there. It was someone else's job to watch out for me, and everyone else. There was nothing I could do for anyone except exactly what I was doing- nothing- and there is an amazing freedom in that.

He checked on me every so often, grinning hugely himself, and the only complaint I had was that the tight binding left my breasts sore. Maybe there's a way to wrap under them and leave them free? What a fun way to torture someone's breasts, actually... *goes off into evil thoughts*

Eventually, they brought me down and I almost whined. Until Rox directed Jack beneath me so that I literally slowly dropped down onto him and he caught me, wrapping his arms around me.

I didn't even bother to get dressed after that, just wrapped a sarong around me, because there was nothing else I could do that night that would come even close to mtaching that.

And yes, I have such a serious crush on Rox now :)

This pics are courtesy and property of Utah Rox- thanks!

Full Moon

Last night, at Terry and Lucivar's, I spent the Full Moon in their hot tub.
Terry was at a meeting, so it was Jack, Lucivar, and I in the hot tub.

I sat opposite the boys, and just to prove to me how incredibly wonderful my life is, and the men in it are, they each took a foot and started rubbing.

Ok, they may have had different motivation, but that's how I took it.

I sat buoyed in hot water (salt, so it didn't even reek of chlorine!), my head cradled by the back of the tub, staring at the incandescent moon glowing like silver sun through the pine trees, while two beautiful men rubbed my feet.

Really, my life is absolutely fucking amazing. And I mean really fucking amazing.

Later, Terry joined us, and we all sat around in the hot water and chatted for a while.

Random vignettes from the weekend- Jack, Lucivar, and I

Let it be said that Jack and I had never coTopped before this weekend. We'd talked about it, and made happy sounds at the idea, but we'd never coTopped before.
Until Friday.

We finally got everyone up into the room, and we were all hanging out. I don't remember where Terry was. It was Jack, Lucivar, and I in the hotel room.
Lucivar was showing Jack some of their toys, their canes. Jack grabbed one, whipped it around, then popped Lucivar with it. Lucivar, shameless little slut that he is, promptly started wiggling his ass for more. I suggested that perhaps they'd both get a better effect without Lucivar's pants. Approximately 1.5 seconds later, Lucivar was naked. Shocking, I know.
I watched for a bit, then remembered that I hadn't yet shown Lucivar my evil stick. I forgot it on my last trip somehow.
That's when I got involved- hey, I can't resist a beautiful, begging boy.
We turned him over on his back, and I straddled his chest, my ass almost in his face, and Jack spread his thighs wide.

Have you ever seen an evil stick? It's a little piece of very stiff wire, maybe 16 or 18 gauge, with a flat little oval of pretty acrylic on the end. I'll have to take a picture of it an put it up eventually. It's very stiff, so when you bend it, and pop that little acrylic end on someone's inner thighs, they make lovely, yummy noises. They also try to buck you off, but hey, I've got strong thighs.

We dumped out my toybag after a little while of that, Jack mostly using various canes, me using my favorite hairbrushes and metal nails, both of us using riding crops, hands, and more or less whatever we felt like.
There's nothing organized about our play. We tend to just dump out the toybag and grab whatever looks interesting.

Eventually, we had to cuff him and attach his wrists to the headboard. Did you know that the DomConAtlanta hotel has wrought iron headboards on the beds that are bolted, quite securely, into the walls? We do, now. Lucivar does, now.

His face was so cute, the way he twisted and writhed, and his eyes got huge and deeper green.

We would hurt him for a while, then stop to kiss one another and grin, then we'd go back to hurting him, then make out a little more on top of the helpless, hurting little boy. I think the noises he made while we were making out were nearly as good as the one she made while we were hurting him.
I officially love playing with Jack, I felt so delightfully close to him as we worked together to hurt Lucivar as much as possible. Hey, every couple needs to have hobbies they can do together!

Eventually, we had to let him go so that he could shower and shave. He kept making these adorable false starts that ended with his head back in my lap and my fingers tangled in his hair (I never said the false starts weren't partly my fault) and him making more pretyt noises for me.

He's such a little slut.
It's really adorable.

And you know what?
Jack said I can fuck his pretty little ass :-D

Why I love my partner

Quote regarding abortion and reproductive rights:
"I just don't think it's right that 60 year old men (the Supreme Court) are making decisions about what women can do with their bodies."
-Jack

Playing with Jack

Last night, after the abundance of Toppy play and talking and thinking and writing that I've been doing, I started craving some balance. Jack commented at dinner with Olga that he wishes I were more of a masochist because he'd love to hurt me.
I commented that while I'm still not much of a masochist, I was definitely in the mood to be hurt. He perked right up :)

So last night, after we got home, he grabbed my hair to ensure that I was in the right mindset, then had me undress him, then reciprocated down to my thin tank top and panties. He had me wait for him on the bed, then went simply rubbed and petted me for a while, getting me used to his hands again (I can have strange issues with being touched sexually sometimes, especially post all the weird stuff recently), then dumped out the toybag, put my collar on me, and had me suck his cock while he took various things to me. Flogger, small cane, hairbrush, etc. It went a little past the pain I enjoy, but that just puts it into the realm of pain I enjoy dealing with for his sake. At some point he removed the rest of my clothing... things get kinda fuzzy after the first few blows :)

So yeah. Yummy. Finally, he pulled me up against him, curling my head into his shoulder and I just melted there for a while.
It wasn't the longest scene I've ever done. It wasn't the most amazing scene I've ever done, or the mst painful.

But it was a beautifully intimate reintroduction to playing with him, which isn't something we've done in far too long.

I slept in my collar last night. The slight jingling kept waking me up, but it was so worth it.

I woke up with a smile this morning.

Dinner and a show

Tonight, after our brusing conversation with Gloria, Jack and I decided to go out together to dinner. A treat we can't afford, but needed anyway. So we drove out on the causeway, and had dinner at Oysterella's, sitting out on the patio to watch the sunset over the bay.
It was... wonderful. Moments like that remind me why we are still together through everything.
The food was amazing (they even pan-fried my grouper for me) and the bread pudding was absolutely phenomenal.

And the company was... bliss.

We've promised one another more nights together like that. Although preferably, without the hefty dinner bill ;-)