Better

I'm starting to feel better.
Slowly, slowly. The better-ness is creeping up on little cat feet like fog. Slowly, quietly, so subtle that I almost dont notice it, until I look up and realize that it's wrapping gently around me, obscuring my stress like vision in the fog. I'm not on the edge of tears.
I can handle the thought of my responsibilities again.
I'm not ready to face them yet, but I can handle the thought of them again.

Yesterday, Jack and I finished our last exams, and we're anticipating pretty good grades this semester (I'm thinking 3 A's and a low B/high C), and we're now safe in Small Town, GA, with Terry and Lucivar.

Last night, I curled up in the hot tub with Lucivar, hiding under the hothot water from the chilly night air. We cuddled together- not hurting, not playing, not doing kinky things. Just cuddling and talking and relaxing as the buoyant water tried to lift me up and swirl me around with the jets of heat.
We came back inside, steaming in the chilly air and glowing pink to freshly-made oatmeal-butterscotch cookies (Terry is a phenomenal cook) and the loving companionship of our partners, and I just relaxed for a little while, surrounded by people I love.

It was one of the best nights of my life.